牧者的憂慮PastoralAnxiety
作者: Kevin DeYoung 譯者: Maria Marta
在我成為牧師之前，哥林多後書十一章28節對我來說似乎總是一節奇怪的經文。保羅在這裡一口氣說出他為耶穌自始至終所受的痛打------勞碌辛苦，多次不得睡覺，又飢又渴，多次缺糧，赤身挨冷（23-27節）。 然後作為畫龍點睛，保羅提到一個更大的磨煉：「除了這些外面的事，還有為眾教會掛心的事天天壓在我身上」（28節）。這就是偉大的使徒，他甘心樂意為他牧養的人付上一切，將這一切都看為喜樂（十二15），他好像憂愁，卻是常常喜樂（六10）。這就是保羅，面對每種想象得到的對抗，卻學會了知足（腓四11），並且毫無憂慮（四6）。在此他亦承認，盡管他忍受了一切，但仍然為所有的教會感到焦慮。
自從我成為牧師以來，我在這節經文找到不同尋常的安慰。倒不是說我完成了保羅所完成的，或經歷了他所遭遇的，而是說每一位認真的牧師都會感受到為教會肩負的這種重擔。 保羅要肩負幾間教會的重擔。教會裡充滿內訌和誹謗。會眾容忍錯誤的教導。他們一方面傾向於律法主義，另一方面又陷入混亂。 一些教會成員將微不足道的事化作極其重要，而其他一些人則太願意在基督信仰的基本真理上妥協。保羅愛這些教會，他們爭鬥的重壓壓在他身上，比沈船或監禁更沈重。
在進一步講述之前，讓我明確一點：我認為牧師不是唯一負擔重压的人。 從很多方面說來，我們擁有世上最好的工作。要做大多數日子裏所做的事，我當然感到極其蒙恩。 我沒有興趣比較牧師職事與其他職業的困難。 我所要做的是鼓勵牧師們繼續打那美好的仗，並鼓勵會眾繼續鼓勵他們的牧師。
保羅每天都感到來自教會的壓力，對此我並不感到驚奇。他的工作似乎從未松懈過。他要寫書信，要去訪問，也要為耶路撒冷的聖徒收集捐款。他必須派人到處奔走，並遠距離管理眾教會的事務。他必須回應無數的批評，而這些批評往往自相矛盾。有些人認為他太苛刻。其他人則說他太軟弱。他的教會內有些人是禁慾者，認為保羅是世俗的。其他人則放蕩不羈，認為保羅的道德要求太高。他們質疑保羅的資格。他們將他與原初的使徒作負面的比較。他們將他比作假使徒，沒有一點說服力。他們不喜歡他的講道風格。他們不喜歡他的紀律。有些日子，他們只是不再喜歡保羅。這一切都是針對這個人：他把他們帶到基督的面前，像父親一樣愛他們，拒收他們的錢財，為他們的屬靈益處甘冒生命危險。難怪對保羅而言，沒有負擔比照顧上帝子民的負擔更沈重的了。
詢問任何一個認真對待他的工作的牧師，他都會告訴你他在事工中感到的壓力-------人處於危機，人離開，人到來，人對他失望，人使他失望。在牧養工作中，牧師要努力擠出時間學習、祈禱、準備、與家庭相處。他努力提升自己，培訓新領袖，滿足預算要求，深入了解宣教士，聲援重要的計劃，提供深入淺出的崇拜和證道，回應新想法，聆聽會眾的關注，作好準備幫助遇到困難的人。
大多數牧師對他們可以做的所有其他事情都有負擔：多傳福音，多關心貧困的人，多宣教，多處理全球關注的問題，多解決社會關注的問題。有些牧師讀到這裏，他們想知道教會對他們的講道是否有回應；領導層對他們的領導是否作出回應；會眾是否會像他們多次聽到的教會那樣成長。最重要的是，每一個牧師都有自己個人的傷痛，自己個人的錯誤，以及自己那需要照顧的屬靈健康。我們都是軟弱的人。
但我們深受鼓舞。上帝揀選了世上愚笨的，使那些有智慧的羞愧（林前一章27）。上帝的恩典是夠你用的；祂的能力是在人的軟弱上顯得完全（林後十二9）。為基督的緣故，就以軟弱、淩辱、急難、逼迫、困苦為可喜樂的。因你什麼時候軟弱，什麼時候就剛強了（10節）。保羅有壓力。你也有壓力。但上帝能處理壓力。當你不能的時候，上帝仍看是好的。
註: 所有聖經經文皆引自《圣經新譯本》 。
本文原刊於Tabletalk雜誌。
Pastoral
Anxiety
FROM
Kevin DeYoung
Second
Corinthians 11:28 always seemed like a strange verse to me — until I became a
pastor. Here’s Paul, rattling off all the ways he’s been beat up for Jesus —
imprisonments, lashes, rods, stonings, shipwrecks, drifting at sea, sleepless
nights, hunger and thirst, cold and exposure, danger from everyone everywhere
(vv. 23–27). And then, as the cherry on top, Paul mentions one more trial:
“apart from other things, there is the daily pressure on me of my anxiety for
all the churches” (v. 28). This is the mighty apostle, the one who counted it a
joy to “spend and be spent” for his people (12:15), the one who was sorrowful
yet always rejoicing (6:10). This is the Paul who faced every imaginable
opposition and yet learned to be content (Phil. 4:11) and anxious about nothing
(4:6). And here he is admitting that even with everything else he’s endured, he
still feels anxiety for all the churches.
Ever
since I became a pastor, I have found unusual comfort in this verse. It’s not
that I have accomplished what Paul accomplished or suffered what he suffered,
but every earnest minister feels this burden for the church. And Paul had
several churches to burden him. The churches were full of infighting and
backbiting. They put up with false teaching. They were prone to legalism on one
end and complete chaos on the other. Some of the church members were making
insignificant matters too important, while others were too willing to
compromise on Christian essentials. Paul loved these churches, and their
struggles burdened him more than shipwreck or imprisonment.
Before
I go any further, let me be clear: I don’t think pastors are the only ones with
burdens. In many ways, we have the best job in the whole world. I certainly
feel exceedingly thankful to do what I do on most days. I have no interest in
comparing the difficulty of pastoral ministry with the difficulties of other
vocations. All I want to do is to encourage pastors to keep fighting the good
fight and encourage congregations to keep encouraging their pastors.
I’m
not surprised Paul felt daily pressure for the churches. His work never seemed
to let up. He had letters to write, visits to make, and a collection to gather
for the saints in Jerusalem. He had to send people here and there, and manage
the affairs of his churches from a distance. He had to respond to myriad
criticisms, often conflicting criticisms. Some people thought he was too harsh.
Others said he was too weak. Some people in his churches were ascetics and
thought Paul was worldly. Others were licentious and thought Paul was too
ethically demanding. They questioned his credentials. They compared him
negatively to the original apostles. They thought him lame compared to the
false apostles. They didn’t like his preaching style. They didn’t like his
discipline. On some days, they just didn’t like Paul anymore. All this for the
man who led them to Christ, loved them like a father, refused their money, and
risked his neck for their spiritual good. No wonder there was no weight for
Paul like the weight of caring for God’s people.
Ask
any pastor who really takes his work seriously and he will tell you of the
pressures he feels in ministry — people in crisis, people leaving, people
coming, people disappointed by him, people disappointing to him. In the midst
of this work, the pastor is trying to find time for study, prayer, preparation,
and family. He’s trying to improve himself, train up new leaders, meet the
budget, get to know a few missionaries, champion important programs, provide
for deep, accessible worship and preaching, be responsive to new ideas, listen
to new concerns, and be ready to help when people are in trouble.
And
most pastors feel a burden for all the other things they could be doing: more
evangelism, more for the poor, more for missions, more to address global
concerns, and more to address social concerns. There are pastors reading this
who wonder if the church is still responsive to their preaching; if the
leadership will ever be responsive to their leading; and if the congregation
will ever grow like the churches they hear so much about. On top of all this,
every pastor has his own personal hurts, his own personal mistakes, and his own
spiritual health to attend to. We are all weak.
But
be encouraged. God uses weak things to shame the strong (1 Cor. 1:27). His
grace is sufficient for you; His power is made perfect in weakness (2 Cor.
12:9). For the sake of Christ, then, be content with weaknesses, insults,
hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when you are weak, then you are
strong (v. 10). Paul had pressure. You have pressure, too. But God can handle
the pressure. And He looks good when you can’t.
This
post was originally published in Tabletalk magazine.
